Again

And in the same way it appeared my newly gained self-confidence vanishes. Today I was a grown-up, I carried on with my responsibilities, I even smiled, but not anymore. I feel helpless, I need to cry. But I do not want to, I promised I was not going back to those days. I am at the University and I want to runaway home. I want a hug, but I do not deserve it right now. Why? I was happy, I was honestly happy today. Why it disappeared so suddenly. I want to feel like that again but I cannot. My heart hurts and my stomach is upset. I do not even care anymore. I need to get to the restroom so I can freely cry. Even if I do not why, I just need to do it.

I thought this was over, I had been feeling better, I even became closer to some friends. I decided to be more open, to be happy and normal. And now without a reason I just can't feel anything good. I need to get home but it is not time yet. I will cry and try to forget the reason I am sad even if I do not even know why...